There Before the Chaos Read online

  A chill worked up my spine despite the sunshine, and I suddenly felt the need to run. “Race?” I asked, and lengthened my stride, pulling away from Gita. Sensing rather than hearing her surprise, I knew the moment she adjusted her speed to keep up with me. It wasn’t that difficult; my Dve was as long-limbed as I was, nearly matching me in height, and she’d put on several kilos of muscle in the last six months.

  Johar chuckled and passed us both, her long, loping strides powered by genetic and technological augmentations. I dug into my last reserve of strength in an effort to catch up, but Johar was the fastest of our trio.

  We sprinted. The sound of the rising tide and our breaths mixed with the singing of the dolphins in Balhim Bay. Indranan dolphins were cousins to the ones back on Earth, their hides a darker gunmetal gray with unique white markings. They were also smarter than their Earth kin and sang sweet songs like a chorus of angels.

  I slowed to a walk when we reached the jagged rocks and walked to the water’s edge to watch the dolphins leap and play in the rising sun. The trio of BodyGuards waiting for us approached, their conversation carried away by the breeze.

  “I swear I will beat you one of these days,” Gita said, the breeze snatching her laughter away as she came to stand at my side. Her loose black curls danced in the breeze.

  “Only when she stops cheating.” Johar dodged my swing. Her laughter was deeper than Gita’s, belly-deep and unapologetic.

  “You won, how can you accuse me of cheating?”

  Johar gave a shrug that said just like that? and grabbed for my arm on the next swing, but I dodged behind Gita, who held her hands up.

  “Hiding behind your Dve is cheating,” Johar declared. “Zin, she’s cheating.”

  I turned as Zin, Indula, and Iza reached us. The BodyGuards of Team One were splayed out in standard formation; Zin faced me while the other two kept their eyes in the opposite direction. They were all dressed in matte-black uniforms and wore Hessian 45s on their hips.

  “You get used to it,” Starzin Hafin replied, a grin on his broad, handsome face.

  Emmory’s husband was an imposing figure. The former Tracker was shorter than me with wide shoulders and a jovial face. His smile could light up a room and ignited his gray-green eyes with a twinkling quality I’d only seen in the sands of Granzier. If you didn’t know him well, you’d assume he was never serious, but I had seen his grim determination during our fight to regain my throne, and he was one among a handful of people I trusted without reservation.

  “Cheating or not, I wasn’t sure I could keep up with you at the end there,” Gita said, her dark eyes sparkling with mirth as she took the towel Zin offered.

  “It was a good sprint.” I faked a smile in Zin’s direction as he handed me a towel and scrubbed at my face. The fabric hid my worried frown as I replayed our conversation and my gut twisted at the thought of two powerful alien races going to war anywhere near humanity. The Shen and Farians could kill or heal with a touch. But the Farians were Indrana’s allies and had been for centuries, which meant any escalation of their long-standing conflict with the mysterious Shen potentially involved my empire.

  “You are improving,” Johar said, knocking me out of my thoughts. “I don’t remember you being quite that fast before.”

  “What are you talking about? I used to outrun you all the time.”

  “I have no memory of this.” She sniffed, grinning when I punched her in the arm again.

  “It occurs to me, Majesty,” Zin said. “If you’d wanted to get away from us you could have outrun Emmory and me. I can run well enough, but not that fast with this.” He gestured at his left leg, the prosthetic from the knee down hidden by his uniform pants. “And Emmory is fast, but you’re faster. Though if you tell him I said so I’ll deny it.”

  Laughing for real this time, I threw the towel back at him and shrugged into the blue jacket Gita passed along as I pushed thoughts of the Farians and Shen to the back of my mind. “You know Emmory would have just shot me in the back, but I’ll remember it for my escape plan.”

  “Uie Maa, you’re not leaving us now and we all know it,” Zin teased. He put a hand on my back as we headed for the aircar.

  “You could definitely outrun Indula,” Iza said, her grin flashing white against her dark skin. “I’m not sure I could catch you in a short sprint, but my endurance is decent.”

  “Hush, shorty,” Indula replied. He threw me a wink, long lashes falling over his pale blue eyes as he struggled to keep his smile from spreading over his pretty face.

  This pair of Guards had come to us late, during the chaos of my return home and fight for my throne against my cousin. Iza had been a policewoman in the capitol, and Indula had been one of my mother’s BodyGuards. Initially they’d been on Team Two, but over the last six months Emmory had been shifting teams around as he solidified my BodyGuard teams with new recruits.

  The three BodyGuards at the vehicle were all new. Muna Vandi was yet another volunteer from one of the noble families of Indrana, while Riddhi and Sahil Gupta came from more humble origins.

  I knew their names now and even extra details not found in the BodyGuard files stored in my smati. The collection of computer chips embedded in my brain provided me with the information from the files Emmory had given me one night after a timely piece of advice Cas had managed to issue from beyond the grave.

  It meant getting attached, and I wasn’t sure I could do that, but my former Dve insisted: I also know you’ll have distanced yourself from your new BodyGuards to try to avoid the pain of losing them. Don’t. Make yourself vulnerable. Treat them the way you treated me, and Jet, and Will. It’s why we loved you, it’s why we didn’t hesitate when the moment came.

  He’d been right and I’d been wrong and though it was hard, over the last six months I’d opened myself up to the women and men responsible for my safety even though it meant carrying around more pain in my heart when one of them died.

  And they would, they always did. Just like Cas. Just like Portis.

  I’d thought the man who’d rescued me from a gang of street punks on New Delhi was a rogue, a former member of the Imperial Tactical Squad, an arm of the Indranan military, who’d been dishonorably discharged for theft and smuggling. As it turned out, Portis Tresk had been sent by my childhood BodyGuards to keep me safe out in the black. His crimes were fake. His whole life given in the service of Indrana to keep a wayward princess safe. For twenty years he held to that charge. In the end it had cost him his life.

  Zin closed a hand around my upper arm, squeezing gently and then letting me go. My Ekam and his husband had the benefit of their Tracker talents and a generous file on my gunrunning exploits provided for them when they’d hunted me down to explain their uncanny knowledge of my moods. However, they’d also proved to be quick studies of my body language, and it took more effort than it was worth for me to hide how I was feeling now.

  I smiled and nodded to the two young women and lone young man standing by the car. “Good morning.”

  “Good morning, Majesty,” they echoed.

  “Riddhi, how’s your father doing?”

  Riddhi replied before her brother did, a smile hovering on the edges of her full mouth. “He’s excellent, Majesty, thank you. He said the customers are coming more steadily.”

  “Is he going to send more of that pandolce?” I didn’t even try to keep the little thread of hope out of my voice, and my BodyGuards laughed.

  “I will mention to him you enjoyed it, Majesty.”

  “You do that.” I winked at her. “Muna, how’s your mother?” Muna’s mother was the daughter of Mila Vandi, the general in charge of the Imperial Tactical Squad, and she’d been injured during the fighting in the capital chasing down Wilson’s forces in the final engagement.

  “She’s recovering. The doctors say she will be out of the hospital by next week.”

  “I’m glad to hear it.” I patted her on the shoulder as I got into the aircar. “Tell her I’ll be by to vi
sit soon.”

  “I will, ma’am.” She closed the door with a smile.

  I leaned my head back and spotted Johar grinning at me. “What?”

  “Nothing,” she said, shaking her head. “You’re good at being an empress.”

  “Shut up.”

  2

  Good morning, Majesty. Johar.” Alba Tenaka greeted me with a smile when I slid from the aircar. My chamberlain was a brilliant woman with straight black hair and dark eyes. She’d been a member of Clara Desai’s household before I hired her and sometimes it felt as though we’d been together for years instead of only these past chaotic months.

  If it weren’t for her I’d have run away from this job the moment an opportunity presented itself and never looked back.

  “How was your run?” she asked.

  “The weather was lovely, and Johar kicked my ass on the final sprint,” I replied with a grin. “What do we have on the schedule today?”

  “You’ve got an hour and a half, and then the daily intelligence briefing. After that is a meeting with the Tarsi delegation to finalize the trade agreements,” Alba said, falling into step with us, her heels clacking on the pavement as we headed up to the door of the hotel I called home while my palace was rebuilt.

  We’d moved from the tiny hotel on the outskirts of Krishan—used during the fight to reclaim my throne—to something larger in the middle of the city that could handle the needs of my ever-expanding staff. The Indranan Star Hotel was better able to bear the burden of an entire floor shut down for the empress and her crew. The cluster of buildings in the middle of the capital were tall, fluted structures that billowed outward and then spiked toward the sky. We’d settled into the smallest of the three buildings as I tried my best to minimize the disruption of my presence.

  I’d read the briefing she’d sent me last night about the Tarsi, but couldn’t resist the tease. “Trade agreements? What trade agreements?”

  “You were up late reading Admiral Hassan’s reports again instead of mine, weren’t you?” Alba sighed.

  “I was, but I read yours first.” I’d learned my lesson early on to pay attention to the things she did for me and to value her hard work by putting in my own time in response.

  “Good morning, Majesty.”

  “Good morning,” I replied, using the greeting from the hotel doorman and the BodyGuards just inside the doors to dodge Alba’s reproving look and continued across the foyer to the lift.

  The lift dinged and the doors opened. Alba and Zin stepped into the tiny space, Johar following. I closed my eyes for just a second, my humor vanishing when faced with the tiny metal box, and dragged in a breath before I followed them. Gita, Iza, and Indula joined us and I squeezed my eyes shut as my claustrophobia sank its dagger-sharp claws into my chest. “You could shoot me now, Zin. I wouldn’t complain. Sorry, I’m in a strange mood this morning. Continue.”

  Alba cleared her throat. “After the Tarsi delegation, Caterina Saito has asked if you’ll sit in on the Matriarch Council meeting. They’re discussing the budget and the topic of integrating eldest sons into the Ancillary Council today. She thought your presence for such a historic occasion would be worthwhile.”

  “Not to mention quelling any potential ruckus,” I muttered.

  Alba nodded with a sigh. “Most likely, Majesty; you do tend to have a calming effect on objections.”

  “It’s because everyone is still so Shiva-damned convinced I’m going to shoot them if they disagree.” I shot her a sideways glance. “I should tell them to be more afraid of you.”

  “You tend to suggest shootings more than your mother did, Majesty,” Alba replied, ignoring my accusation with a tiny smile.

  “Mother seems more likely to have suggested they go do the deed themselves.”

  The elevator came to a stop, the doors sliding open with what seemed like excruciating slowness after the little ding of our arrival. My BodyGuards stepped out of my way with practiced ease, no one commenting on the fact that I went straight to the large window in the foyer and stared, unseeing, out over the capital until I could trust myself to speak without screaming.

  I’d suffered from claustrophobia since my childhood and an unfortunate incident that had left me trapped in a tunnel under the old palace for several hours before my father had rescued me along with Mother’s Ekam, Ven. Then Wilson, in his madness, had locked me in a metal coffin and drowned me. That I survived it was a testament to the gods’ foolishness and my own stubbornness. However, the doctors told me that I’d have issues with enclosed spaces for the rest of my life, and the past six months had been a rather haphazard game of chance as we discovered my new limits.

  A train zoomed by on the rail system that ran past the window, and fifteen stories below people moved along the street, going about their day. A sense of normalcy had returned to Krishan since Wilson’s takeover and the battles that followed. Most days I was better than I’d ever been, but some days I swung wildly from one extreme to the other.

  “I’m going to go get cleaned up,” Johar said, slipping her hand around my upper arm and giving it a squeeze. “I’ll see you later. Thanks again for the run.”

  “Thanks for joining us,” I replied, and managed a smile now that my panic had dissipated. “Is Alice going to be there? She didn’t mention it at breakfast.” I turned from the window and headed toward my rooms.

  “No, ma’am,” Alba replied. “Your heir has a doctor’s appointment and then she and Taz are presiding over a memorial dedication down at the docks this afternoon before they head for her estate.”

  Alice and her husband, Tazerion Shivan, trapped back here on Pashati during Wilson’s attempted coup, had joined forces to fight the traitors. What had started as dislike between my new heir and the leader of the Upjas bloomed into love. I’d seen it clear enough, though even if the affection hadn’t been there it was likely I’d have married them to each other anyway.

  It turned out I was as ruthless an empress as my mother.

  The marriage of the pair cemented the new direction for Indrana’s future. One of equality and progress. One where sons and daughters were seen through the same lens. My heir and her husband would never rule Indrana—but their daughter would once I died. Until then I would be with her every step of the way, guiding Indrana into a brighter era, bullying when necessary.

  The reactions to the wedding had been mixed. Though the predictable outrage to putting a former rebel leader like Taz that close to the throne had been less than the reaction to the return of the former gunrunner who currently occupied it. Eventually the news reports had settled back into something resembling pre-coup Indrana, and these days all they talked about was the impending signing of the peace treaty with the Saxon Kingdom.

  Which was why Alice and Taz were headed for the safety of her family home in the country. Promise of peace aside, that ever-wary part of me didn’t trust the Saxons not to try something, and I was going to make sure my heir and her child were as far away from danger as I could put them.

  Our enmity with the only other government in this arm of the galaxy was a long and sordid tale. One that had come about in part because of Wilson’s machinations, but also due to Saxony’s habit of expanding into territories that didn’t belong to them.

  My threat to take the Indranan Navy and wipe them off the fabric of the universe even though I’d just been knocked off my throne had been taken seriously by Jaden Toropov. This afternoon I would welcome their delegation, complete with the new Saxon king, to Pashati to sign a treaty heavily weighted in favor of my empire.

  It was the peace and stability Indrana so desperately needed. A return of our lost planets and with them lost industries that would bring a much-needed boost to our economy. And once Saxony was back on their feet we would also see some sizable cash reparations.

  The newslines were lauding me as a peacemaker, but the truth was I was as desperate for peace as the Saxons. Indrana’s people deserved a future freed from war.

  If I
was going to be honest—I deserved it as well.

  “Have the reservations at Shivan’s been taken care of for the dinner with Mr. Hanson?”

  “Yes, ma’am.” Alba’s steps didn’t falter as she checked the information into her smati. “Your lunch is free today and the afternoon has been set aside for the Saxon delegation’s arrival.” We stopped at the door to my rooms, and I greeted the two Guards on the door as they came to attention with a jumbled chorus of “Your Majesty” and “Dve Desai.”

  My maid was also waiting, and Stasia smiled up at me. “I spoke with Fasé this morning, Majesty,” she said by way of a greeting. “She said to tell you to pay attention to the little things and she will see you soon.”

  I raised an eyebrow. “Really?”

  Stasia smiled, pushing a golden curl away from her face. “I know you are still angry with her—you have every right to be. But listen to her, please?”

  I couldn’t ignore the sting of pain. Fasé Terass—a valued member of my circle since the beginning—had been released from her service in the Indranan military and sent home to atone for breaking the faith.

  Farians could heal humans. They could also kill us and bring us back to life, though both those things were forbidden by their religion. Fasé had saved the lives of so many of my people with her ability to heal and had violated her people’s most sacred laws for us not once, but twice.

  She’d also killed, though not directly with a hand to my former Dve’s skin, but by telling him of a future where Indrana burned unless he sacrificed himself.

  My anger at what Fasé had done was fading, replaced with a sadness I couldn’t find words for and tangled in forgiveness I couldn’t grant. She’d sent Cas to his death, claiming it was the only way to save us all. She’d sacrificed him without thought or care. I still couldn’t forgive her for the loss of my previous Dve.